Think this shit’s funny?
Keep making rape jokes then.
It really gets me when people say things like “why didn’t you report them!?” or “it’s your fault, you let them walk free”. Statistically speaking, rapists will not be convicted, or tried or even brought in for questioning. The victim is lucky if their charges even get a second glance. Plus, the horrific things victims have to go through to prove that they’ve actually been victimized further damages their psyche and healing process, which should be their first priority above anything. It’s the sad reality we live in and rapists know this and it’s why they continue to be so prevalent. In addition, we live in a victim-blaming society where rape is considered a preventable situation in which a person can’t suppress their innate sexual urges instead of a violent, horrific crime. By saying things like “she was asking for it” or “they shouldn’t have been so drunk” suggests rape is something everyone is capable of if they’re tempted enough, which it most certainly is not.
These numbers need to change. This is embarrassing and disgusting, but we as a society, need to start rethinking how we even perceive rape before that can happen.
DEAR EVERYONE WHO TRIES TO TELL ME THAT I’M AN IDIOT FOR NOT REPORTING MY RAPES/WHO CALLS ME A LIAR/WHO SUCKS AS A PERSON
trigger warning: rape detail
not to mention how fucking awful it is to tell police anyway
someone who was once nearly a boyfriend, but at the time a close friend without the commitment attacked me.
a man with a girlfriend he had for several years, which i unfortunately discovered after the attack and after ending communication with him.
when i went into planned parenthood for tests and an exam regarding disease & pregnancy (although he had used a condom, i’m overly cautious), i did not tell them i had been attacked… simply stated that i wanted tests and an exam. however, by law they had to report to police from suspicion of the bruises, burns and cuts i had down there to police
i was a minor, so i had to wait until the police could find my mother in one of the motels i figured she might’ve been staying at last in order to release me. it took several hours.
they found her, ridiculously high off her mind, and discussed with her what had happened. my own mother then proceeded to tell the police that i had mental instability and insecurities, and that i was a bloody liar starved for attention.
(although i did not call the police; planned parenthood physicians did post-exam)
the police WOMAN told me that i was a liar and to not have wasted her time, and if it ever happened, that it probably happened due to the way i was dressed (i was wearing a long dress when i was being questioned), and that i should be more conservative and not “dress like i’m selling my body,” among many other nasty comments that NO ONE deserves to hear, ever. let alone from a “respected” authoritative figure.
from fear of my family’s judgment and peers judgment, i respectfully told the detective that i did not want to go through with any investigation or prosecution of my offender. my family still doesn’t know. perhaps they’d heard rumors or this/that from people, but my attempts of telling them have left me shunned simply by bringing up the topic itself to where i hadn’t even the chance to feel open to discuss the experience. however, to this day, i hope he wakes up in the middle of the night to only find himself gasping for breath and experiencing the most gut-wrenching nightmares that leave his heartbeat without a pace.
to this day, i have heard mutual (now ex-)friends recite his JOKES about rape. with specific details of MY ATTACK, playing it off as if it were a hypothetical EXAMPLE without a tie to my name whatsoever.
worst of all, that was not the only time something along the lines of sexual abuse had happened.
for months on end, i stopped caring about myself.
yet one day, i was strong enough to wake up and say fuck you all. fuck all of you who are rapists, rape apologists, those who encourage rape or do not go to the full extent to defend the victims of rape.
i hate you, and i will do my best to ensure that my life is as best as it may be, and that i may always stray away as far from you that i may.
the death penalty is against my moral views, but i’d make an exception for all rapists.
